Tolerance: Homosexuality is just a phase of adolescent development that many people go through and most people “grow out of.” Thus, gays are less mature than straights and should be treated with the protectiveness and indulgence one uses with a child. Any possibility of becoming straight should be reinforced and those who seem to be born “that way” should be pitied, “the poor dears.” Heterosexuality is more mature and certainly to be preferred. prison, hospitalization, negative behavior therapy, including electric shock). and anything is justified to change them (e.g. Repulsion: Homosexuality is seen as a “crime against nature.” Gays are sick, crazy, immoral, sinful, wicked, etc.
Being afraid to ask questions about lesbian or gay issues when you don’t know the answers. 
Focusing exclusively on someone’s sexual orientation and not on other issues of concern. Asking your lesbian or gay colleagues to speak about lesbian or gay issues, but not about other issues about which they may be knowledgeable. Failing to be supportive when your gay friend is sad about a quarrel or breakup. Worrying about the effect a lesbian or gay volunteer/co-worker will have on your work or your clients. Feeling that a gay man is just a man who couldn’t find a woman or that a gay man is a man who wants to be a woman. 
Feeling that a lesbian is just a woman who couldn’t find a man or that a lesbian is a woman who wants to be a man. Being outspoken about gay rights, but making sure everyone knows you are straight. Assuming that everyone you meet is heterosexual. Feeling that discussions about homophobia are not necessary since you are “okay” on these issues. Feeling that gays and lesbians are too outspoken about lesbian and gay civil rights. Not asking about a woman’s female partner or a man’s male partner although you regularly ask “How is your husband/wife?” when you run into a heterosexual friend. Not confronting a homophobic remark for fear of being identified with lesbians and gays. Feeling repulsed by public displays of affection between lesbians and gay men but accepting the same displays of affection between heterosexuals. Thinking that a lesbian (if you are female) or gay man (if you are male) is making sexual advances if she/he touches you. Using the terms “lesbian” or “gay” as accusatory. Thinking you can spot some who identifies on the GLBT spectrum. Changing your seat in a meeting because a lesbian sat in the chair next to yours. Looking at a lesbian or gay man and automatically thinking of her/his sexuality rather than seeing her/him as a whole, complex person. It is important for supportive allies of the GLBT community to recognize certain homophobic levels of attitude so that they may take steps towards changing that attitude. 
We often overlook these more subtle actions and exclusions because they seem so insignificant by comparison but they are not. There are many other kinds of homophobia and heterosexism that happen every day. Sometimes it takes the form of physical acts of hate, violence, verbal assault, vandalism or blatant discrimination, such as firing an employee, evicting someone from their housing, or denying them access to public accommodations based solely on their sexual orientation or their perceived/assumed sexual orientation.
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